20 miler?

So I've been quiet lately that's cause I am really tired and equally busy. Yesterday I went out for a 20 miler, I think, I mean I paused my garmin at 18.30 and ran 1 or 2 more miles and couldn't tell you when i finished. I collected my butts scooped them in the truck and made it home for an ice bath in which I cried. I had so been looking forward to this I love the iamsuchabadass  feeling and I feed off it. And this numbers monkey can't deal with maybe, so I was going for 20 but I don't know what happened.
My legs feel great. Even today stairs- no problem I even did a sprint in the rain at the grocery store with no issue, impressive how good I think I feel. But I do have some extra riders this week that probably affected this run. 
One extra issue some lung crap. Been dealing with homes of cat lovers and avid smokers all week at work  in the mist of probably some kinda cold and ragweed growth outside I have been sniffling and my eyes look red all the time. I have been taking benedryl at night to off put some allergy hell and help my regular antihistamine. 
The Other, I apologize fellas, but I got my monthly visitor that morning. Any chica knows the first day of hell week is not the day for a 20 miler. I do not reschedule for such silliness I drag my butts to the park. But I have been feeling extra drained, this is why. There is no magic anything even the excitement of a training peak to pull you away from mother nature, she can be quite the cranky beeoch. And it also makes for some pretty interesting chafe.
There is always some crappy ass excuse for 'not feeling it' with a run I try to overcome. But sadly I don't think I did. At mile 18 I was thinking of grabbing one of the many runners passing me and begging them to pace me for company for the last 2 I was really feeling that bad.  I probably pulled at 19+ miler but I can't say I got clear to 20 it was foggy at this point.
The good news I am ahead of schedule. Next weekend is a 50 cutback and will be a 10miler  and then 2 weeks from now, A weekend I work mind you, I am doing a 22 before I start my taper. Trying to avoid jello legs at 25 if I can help it. But I feel like I have failed so far hopefull that gives me a little more steam in my engine. I am trying not to be bummed, and to be thankful I am feeling so good legs wise, I don't even know where my foam roller is right now and that IS amazing. God is good to these legs trying to not loose sight of that.

Bigcitydreams, NeverShoutNever