Inspired by tonight's horrific trial of hand me down running shorts on a hilly trail run, here are my thoughts as they rolled out:
Well maybe this won't be so bad once I get moving faster and sweat up....Good thing I am running in the woods cause these shorts have turned into daisy dukes...noooooooo ....shit...people....quick keep your form up high like you are serious and just sprint....ouch.....no really ouch.....at what point Amanda, did you think the loose skin on your thighs had absorbed? You ass, you are moving so much flesh right now on your thighs, you might put your damn back out. you alrready knew this would probably not work out......well don't slow down now and try to pick it out you are stupid and must be punished..... shit.... more people........I am a serious Olympic grad marathon runner that LIKES chafe that's why I wear my shorts like underpants in the middle, I hope it bleeds.... ouch... it might.....but these shorts look really cute standing still.....once again you will pay now get your ass up that hill....okay maybe i will try to pick it a little....dear god what have I done....excuse me miss you seem to have started your cycle, why no sir that's just my inner thighs bleeding because I dressed like a horse's ass....running shorts are for dudes....and women that weren't almost 3dubs at one point....this run is what I would call a low point in training...thank god this is the woods....I wonder if my ass looks as congested as the front....this is really turning uncomfortable up a notch....thank goodness I am done now... wow my inner thighs are so warm now I could hatch an egg....note to self running shorts are now mandas standing around shorts....friction is not always fun......
....and scene....
onward
Thursday, June 27, 2013
Wednesday, June 26, 2013
Mathew 6:34
" So do not worry about tomorrow; for tomorrow will care for itself. Each day has enough trouble of it's own. "Mathew 6:34
Apparently I shouldn't be spazzing out, per biblical order. I am trying to roll with the punches, and I feel have been doing okay with that .
I can only admit my stomach has been starting to bother me but I think its from stress. I pledge to make this summer the summer of unplanned/detool-ed training. It is a goal and a must. Really it is my only time to not freak out about schedules, that just ain't right. This weekend I do a 12 miler. I start rolling right in to the big stuff after next weekend. I know it's a strange way to relax, but I am calmer when exhausted surely.
I got blessings coming out my ears. I don't want to miss a thing.
Monday, June 24, 2013
j u n e 2 4
So since my last blog I have been kinda quiet. Been busy with being sick, got the sexy laryngitis, both kids got it adding to the bonfire of my whining. So I apologize the world kept turning and I forgot to hold on. I got swept up with all this and forgot all about blogging, I get down and out and sometimes don't have anything to say.
During my brief minor discomfort with my family germs a really dear friend of mine passed away. Lately we hadn't seen each other, but kept in touch through social media. In fact the last time I heard her voice was on the phone about six months ago. A little bit on facebook just about everyday though. She had been disabled for the past few years due to illness. She didn't sound very ill on the phone, in December even though she was, it was shocking to hear she had passed. That morning she had posed a kitten picture on facebook....just like that she was gone. She really was a sweet person, I worked with her in my first attempt to be a working(parttime) mother. She was patient with me, know there was a chunky little 8 month old at home I was spazing over. She loved to listen about stories about my kids, she always listened. Girlfriend was funny too, we were always snickering over something. She had a great laugh, loud and happy. Her favorite funnies- Can I Haz a cheezburger? cat pictures. She knew all about style . She is the solitary one woman that I know that has owned and worn Dior mascara in electric blue, and don't get me started on purses, she just wrote the book. She would wear a fancy hat just to do it, because it looked good, you don't see that everyday She loved her grand kids. Any chance she got to talk about them she was doing it, and her face would just light up. She loved her work. She loved the residents at work she treated them like family. After I left to go elsewhere she would still message me when one of them died, just to make sure I knew. I liked her, my friend, and she'll be missed. I don't think she got enough time.She took an interest to my running through facebook. She was around when I signed up for my first race and lost my first few pounds, there from the beginning. When I did get to speak with her on the phone she would ask about it, I never felt like I was pelting her with stories she didn't feel like hearing. She always made me feel so supported. She would tell me to run some for her too while I was at it...... I intend to.
I signed on for Erie last week. For the full distance. For me. But also for her too, she'll be with me. I don't really have super amounts of time of energy for this right now but I am going to make it happen. Life if short, unpredictable, and a gift.
The race is 9-15-13.
Onward.
During my brief minor discomfort with my family germs a really dear friend of mine passed away. Lately we hadn't seen each other, but kept in touch through social media. In fact the last time I heard her voice was on the phone about six months ago. A little bit on facebook just about everyday though. She had been disabled for the past few years due to illness. She didn't sound very ill on the phone, in December even though she was, it was shocking to hear she had passed. That morning she had posed a kitten picture on facebook....just like that she was gone. She really was a sweet person, I worked with her in my first attempt to be a working(parttime) mother. She was patient with me, know there was a chunky little 8 month old at home I was spazing over. She loved to listen about stories about my kids, she always listened. Girlfriend was funny too, we were always snickering over something. She had a great laugh, loud and happy. Her favorite funnies- Can I Haz a cheezburger? cat pictures. She knew all about style . She is the solitary one woman that I know that has owned and worn Dior mascara in electric blue, and don't get me started on purses, she just wrote the book. She would wear a fancy hat just to do it, because it looked good, you don't see that everyday She loved her grand kids. Any chance she got to talk about them she was doing it, and her face would just light up. She loved her work. She loved the residents at work she treated them like family. After I left to go elsewhere she would still message me when one of them died, just to make sure I knew. I liked her, my friend, and she'll be missed. I don't think she got enough time.She took an interest to my running through facebook. She was around when I signed up for my first race and lost my first few pounds, there from the beginning. When I did get to speak with her on the phone she would ask about it, I never felt like I was pelting her with stories she didn't feel like hearing. She always made me feel so supported. She would tell me to run some for her too while I was at it...... I intend to.
I signed on for Erie last week. For the full distance. For me. But also for her too, she'll be with me. I don't really have super amounts of time of energy for this right now but I am going to make it happen. Life if short, unpredictable, and a gift.
The race is 9-15-13.
Onward.
Sunday, June 2, 2013
Winefart Winnings
So this week I was sore and concerned about my legs. I rested like a good girl should.
Friday I did some lifting and went to a wedding and celebrated right. I was sitting by the cookie table and the bar, both locations were visited more than once. It was obnoxious really knowing I was going to race in the morning. Hubbs asked if I was going for a P. W. a personal worst. I really didn't think it was a great idea to run. This around the table as I get a text from the Kenyan, who is not going to make it at this point. Awful tempting to not go. Leaving the party and getting lost for an extra half an hour of driving made sleeping in instead sound good.
Some how I showed up on time. Tradition converts me to a sucker.
I wasn't registered at all. I managed a shirt in my size, with plenty of time to spare. I was feeling really really gross. Full of wine farts, and wedding cookies, gives a new meaning to 'you are full of it'. Oh I was too. I kept telling myself how stupid I was. I turn on my mp3 player to see my subscription was out on my songs...great. Go to get in the line for the bathroom there is a line and I have to deal with my space issues...snap decision- I use the mens. It was a single room with a lock, whatever, near emergency conditions call for lack of regard for others unfortunately. I mention the garbage I ate, so I am sure you can understand the fantastic smell it made. If you eat clean you really don't reek quite so much or get gassy. You eat garbage you smell like you are rotting on the inside, especially if you aren't used to it. I attempt to fan the grumpy cloud away so when I open the door it's not so intense, I fail, miserably. I give myself the shrug and smile and leave the bathroom. 2 men outside the door waiting....I smile and say, um sorry, and make a beeline for the race lineup bus. I sit here and am still a little giggly. Sorry dude.
I did not warm up. I committed to a bad race. I was going to be injury free and have clean shorts, this wasn't the olympics and I had an achy knee and a bowel like a boa-constrictor, oh well. It was a nice day and I was there, as the gun went off I relaxed into a run down the hill. Somehow I am faster than I thought, I kept talking my self into what was going to happen, I was going to show my self how to ruin a race. My stomach hurt so bad, I had horrible farts. Not just smelly, no I don't smell myself when I run gassy, but horrible by terroristic farting, just mortified I may have to turn right at the bottom of the hill and run home because I pooped. I managed to make it, and probably defend my space nobody passed me, I probably gassed them to death or at least stunned them. I don't know why I accept a glass of wine when it's given to me, it never changes, I get whine farts. Whiskey or Beer wine is prohibited. My knee wasn't bothering me at all but I was "taking it easy". I was enjoying myself and I guess I just kept plugging. At some point I started to feel okay and it became fun. I finished 28:55. Historically 3 seconds slower than last year's derby. Not too shabby for a self promised bad race. I got my first age group first place. A real first place medal. My fourth Derby. WHAT. Yes really. I was by myself so I did my inward celebratory dance.
Today I am feeling good in the knee, not bad, and thankful! Above a makeup free sweaty smirk...
onward
Friday I did some lifting and went to a wedding and celebrated right. I was sitting by the cookie table and the bar, both locations were visited more than once. It was obnoxious really knowing I was going to race in the morning. Hubbs asked if I was going for a P. W. a personal worst. I really didn't think it was a great idea to run. This around the table as I get a text from the Kenyan, who is not going to make it at this point. Awful tempting to not go. Leaving the party and getting lost for an extra half an hour of driving made sleeping in instead sound good.
Some how I showed up on time. Tradition converts me to a sucker.
I wasn't registered at all. I managed a shirt in my size, with plenty of time to spare. I was feeling really really gross. Full of wine farts, and wedding cookies, gives a new meaning to 'you are full of it'. Oh I was too. I kept telling myself how stupid I was. I turn on my mp3 player to see my subscription was out on my songs...great. Go to get in the line for the bathroom there is a line and I have to deal with my space issues...snap decision- I use the mens. It was a single room with a lock, whatever, near emergency conditions call for lack of regard for others unfortunately. I mention the garbage I ate, so I am sure you can understand the fantastic smell it made. If you eat clean you really don't reek quite so much or get gassy. You eat garbage you smell like you are rotting on the inside, especially if you aren't used to it. I attempt to fan the grumpy cloud away so when I open the door it's not so intense, I fail, miserably. I give myself the shrug and smile and leave the bathroom. 2 men outside the door waiting....I smile and say, um sorry, and make a beeline for the race lineup bus. I sit here and am still a little giggly. Sorry dude.
I did not warm up. I committed to a bad race. I was going to be injury free and have clean shorts, this wasn't the olympics and I had an achy knee and a bowel like a boa-constrictor, oh well. It was a nice day and I was there, as the gun went off I relaxed into a run down the hill. Somehow I am faster than I thought, I kept talking my self into what was going to happen, I was going to show my self how to ruin a race. My stomach hurt so bad, I had horrible farts. Not just smelly, no I don't smell myself when I run gassy, but horrible by terroristic farting, just mortified I may have to turn right at the bottom of the hill and run home because I pooped. I managed to make it, and probably defend my space nobody passed me, I probably gassed them to death or at least stunned them. I don't know why I accept a glass of wine when it's given to me, it never changes, I get whine farts. Whiskey or Beer wine is prohibited. My knee wasn't bothering me at all but I was "taking it easy". I was enjoying myself and I guess I just kept plugging. At some point I started to feel okay and it became fun. I finished 28:55. Historically 3 seconds slower than last year's derby. Not too shabby for a self promised bad race. I got my first age group first place. A real first place medal. My fourth Derby. WHAT. Yes really. I was by myself so I did my inward celebratory dance.
onward
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