5.

So last night I got a massage and sat down for some good old mind numbing tv, what was on? Rocky. Of course it was. I think that they might be playing all the movies this week on AMC, perfect right?  We'll probably stay tuned to that channel after bed time this week.
Today I am cleaning out my kids drawers and putting away things from summer, digging out winter clothes. Its quiet an ordeal with my my hand me downs. I am fortunate to have 2 kids, same sex, exactly 2 years apart in clothing sizes. I emptied out the youngest's sock drawer today, there were infant socks still in there by oversite. They have both grown so much it's amazing. They are beautiful, I couldn't be anymore thankful for them than I already am, really they are gifts-I do meant that just to be their mom is more than I would have asked for. I am so blessed. So as I tear up over a lone onesie that shouldn't be in with the 3t's I listen to my little gifts scream about who gets to play with the Camero matchbox.

Naturally it just doesn't seem real. None of this does. The race is 5 days away, unbelievable. I mean really, I felt like I wayyyyyyyy over shot when I told people what I was going for, but when I say I will do something, assume it done. It's really just surreal. Life is moving on all around me. My kids are growing up, they don't need me like they did before, I know they still need me. The seasons are changing, the leaves are falling. Everyone's changed little by little over time, and really you don't notice until you compare. Like when you hold up and infant sock to a size 10 1/2. I have changed too. Suddenly what I worked at is starting to define me to others, I'm a runner now.  Even my kids notice now. Last week Miles said " I am going to run with my mom someday", he said it to hubbs, I was in the room I had to turn away because I started to cry. I hope he does someday, it would be awesome.
I am working on getting back into Marathon state of mind, I took a detour mentally and blocked it out. I am trying to remember all of it again to get me focused. Its been a crazy journey so far, I need to face it.

Gonna Fly Now, Rocky Theme- Remix, John x, 2006 Digital Remaster